Dear Shalom,
While I generally agree with the stated sentiment that it is not appropriate in most cases for schools to usurp parental roles and take on discipline for out of school behavior issues, it is unrealistic to say there can be a complete separation between school and home either. One example is legal issues that impact safety must be part of a school's area of influence regardless of where or when they take place. Suicidal threats, bullying, substance abuse, and numerous other issues impact what goes on inside a school and can't be ignored under the guise of "it is only the parents’ responsibility to deal with". On some occasions school professionals are mandated reporters by law if they suspect abuse or neglect going on outside of school.
It is also a matter of stating how far reaching a school's religious expectations are up front to families who enroll in a school. Some schools (even modern coed) will not accept a student who violates Shabbos. Some schools further to the right (separate gender more traditional) do not allow dating or party attendance. Some schools even further to the right that are Cheders and Yeshivas do not allow internet or TV in student homes. The real issue is the ethos of the school must be spelled out to potential customers about what the role and reach of the school will be if you attend that particular school so there are no surprises later on. It is arguably appropriate to hold students who do not keep stated standards while enrolled in a particular school accountable.
Schools also have an opportunity to fill a powerful role that can sometimes impact a student even more than their home environment. As kids get older the power of adults and parental influence sometimes wains. Part of developing normal growth and independence is for young people to seek out mentors and role models beyond the home. Peers take on more of an influential role as well. School-home partnerships are valuable and school educators, social workers or counselors who have ongoing discussion with parents, therapists or tutors outside of school often provide the best care for students by building a team of support for the student.
Shalom,
Elisha Paul
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/10/2018 07:17PM by mlb.
